I just want to share some things that I have learned lately. McKenna and I tried out a new church this morning and it was a great experience! McKenna did fabulous in her class and had a great time! The people were so friendly and welcoming. When we first moved to the area I had said that I wanted to try this specific church out but had not done so for one reason or another but the other night I felt God really lay on my heart that we needed to get back into church. I did a Google search for churches in my area and this one popped up. There was another church that I had been saying I was going to try out, I even went up and tried to get information about the preschool, because thanks to my wonderful intelligent preschool minister of a mother who has shown me many times in many ways what priorities should be in a good preschool, I have high standards and expectations for those who are going to be teaching my child(ren) about God and His love. So I went up to that church and asked if I could see the preschool minister and was told that they didn't really have a preschool minister but the children's minister also was over preschool. Red flag #1 for me. Now, don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with heading two departments BUT it takes a very special person who can run both effectively without lacking in one area or the other. So, ok. Then I was told that she wasn't in because she teaches school as well. Red flag #2. Again, nothing wrong with having two jobs but being a teacher is a full time job, being a preschool minister is a full time job, being a children's minister is a full time job, being a mother in a full time job, being a wife is a full time job, how does this lady make herself fully available to each and every job?? So by this time I am getting kind of uncomfortable. It didn't really help that the secretary that I was speaking with did not even go to the church and could not really tell me anything that I wanted to know. In the end, she took my name and number and said she would have the children's minister call me and she would be able to answer my questions. The children's minister did not get back to me for a good 3-4 days. Remember, she works full time as a teacher, and the secretary even told me that she doesn't come into the office except for weekends, I think she said. But it was a Saturday night, I think it was, before I even got a call back. She was nice and all but she didn't really tell me anything that convinced me that my child was going to be loved on and taught about God and his love and not just babysat. Not to mention, I have yet to this day, been called again and followed up with or anything. I guess I was just another parent...or that is kind of how I felt/feel. I definitely did not have a peace about the church.
So the other night I was just broken, for a few reasons, and in my talk with God I really just felt He was telling me that I needed to actively look again and not get discouraged. So, as I said, I did a Google search and up popped this church...the one I had said I wanted to try from the beginning. So I went to the website, liked what I saw, but I didn't see anything about a preschool ministry or anything so I wrote a quick email to the pastor (the only email address that was given) and inquired about their views on preschool. What was their security policy? How many children, approximately, would be in McKenna's class? And most importantly, what were their views on preschoolers learning? And by that I mean, McKenna may be 15 months old but I feel that there is no better time to introduce God and His love to a child; how did this church view that? Or were preschoolers just to be babysat while parents go to church? I wrote the email at almost 1AM on Friday morning and by 845AM I had a response from the pastor! He was very enthusiastic and you could tell that he was genuinely happy that I was inquiring such things. He told me a bit about their preschool department and answered my questions and then said that he would forward my email and his response to his wife who heads up that department and she would be able to give me more details. Sure enough, she wrote me a few hours later and told me that they do not just babysit and gave me the name of the curriculum that they use and that they have stories and sing songs and use a flannelgraph. It was just what I needed to hear. I felt extremely comfortable already. I decided that I was going to visit that coming Sunday (today) and I had a peace about it. Now, don't get me wrong, I went through a bit of psyching myself out but I wrote my mom and told her my concerns and she brought me back down to earth and pretty much to stop psyching myself out and McKenna would do great. I had already talked to her about the church and sent her the emails and she had checked out the curriculum for me and she was excited as I was.
So that brings up to this morning. McKenna and I got up and got dressed and made the whole 2 minute trek to church. LOL Mark was not able to go because he had to work, he wanted to, though, and will go when he can. After McKenna and I walk in and walk back to the preschool class a lady walks out to greet me and she goes "Are you Megan Harris?" It was the pastor's wife. Wow! I mean, it is a small church and all but still, to take the time to remember my name from one email and not ever even seeing a picture of me. She introduces herself and as I am filling out the card on McKenna she takes McKenna over to the circle where all of the children are getting ready to sing songs; they had just finished coloring when I got there. McKenna doesn't fuss or whine or even look back, she just goes right along. I finish filling out the card and the pastor is waiting to greet me. He thanks me again for the inquiry about the preschool and for making that a priority and for entrusting them with McKenna and shows me to the sanctuary where Sunday School was.
The entire time, both Sunday School and Big Church, I found myself only a couple of times wondering how McKenna was doing but it was more in the sense of "is she playing?" "is she having fun with the older kids? (There are not any other children her age at this time so she was in with the older children)" things like that, but nothing that made my stomach drop or anything and I didn't dwell on it. I was completely comfortable. I didn't feel awkward or out of place or anything. It has been a while since I have been able to walk into a group of some sort and feel absolutely at ease.
Sunday School was about mourning our sins and the sins of those around us (interesting, considering what brought me to actively seek a church again was being broken, huh?) and church was about the Holy Spirit. The pastor isn't fire and brimstone but he isn't one that is going to hold your hand on your walk with God. And, get this....we sang HYMNS! Like, not worship choruses, actual old hymns. It was SO refreshing! The sermon, as I was saying about the pastor, didn't consist of yelling and dancing on stage (though I love Dr. Reavis!!) but it was most definitely "this is what God says and this is what it means and why".
In between Sunday School and Big Church I had so many people come up and introduce themselves and just talk to me. Even after church there was this one lady that followed me back to the preschool just so that she could welcome me and introduce herself. They were just so welcoming and warm and inviting. I can't wait until Mark can go with me. I just hope that he likes it like I do. I am sure that he will though; especially if it is where God wants us.
With all of that being said, a lot of people use the excuse "I don't have to go to some church to worship God. I believe and I have a relationship with Him. He is in my heart. I don't need to go to a building to worship Him." That is a good excuse but I can tell you right now that it is not about "going to a building", it is about gathering together and fellowshipping with other believers. God says, "Where two or more are gathered I am there" and I don't think that He is saying "as long as you and your wife both believe you are good to pray at breakfast and get that "worship" in." God also says in Hebrew 10:25, "Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another - and all the more as you see the Day approaching." That says it all right there and if we are truly followers of Christ than we will strive to keep His commandments and obey Him. Is that to say that it is not tempting at times to stay home because Mark finally has one day off? No, but God blesses those who obey Him and who knows what we would miss that day at church? I remember a conversation that I had with my mom one time a couple years ago when I was in a slum about church, I was going but I just didn't feel that I was being spoken to, she said "You never know who is watching you and although you may feel that you are not getting anything from it you probably are and you never know who sees you there and goes "Wow, she is here every week" and in turn will bless you." After that conversation my POV changed and it was just what I needed to get my head back on straight. I say that to say, you never know who is watching you!
So all in all, I am so glad that I wrote that email the other day and even more glad that I was open enough to hear God when he was breaking me and speaking to me. It wasn't fun to be broken but it was definitely what I needed. Even Mark, when I told him, said "I wondered when you were going to find a church again" and that kind of hit home the point that I was trying to make earlier in that you never know who is watching you; it might just be your husband or wife and they are just waiting for you to make the first move.
My prayer for anyone who happens onto this specific entry is that you will allow God to speak with you just as he did me at about 1AM Friday morning. You never know what blessings He has in store for you.
